What’s the universe trying to tell me? This is one of the most frequently asked questions people ask me when they are having a crappy time. Whether they have met the fiftieth loser on match.com. Or have applied for a 1000 jobs and only got 3 interviews and not even the manners from those 3 to tell you that “Sorry we gave it to someone younger/more qualified/less qualified, more flexible.” Or perhaps the right home hasn’t appeared. I know that when we were trying to buy over the last few years we just missed out on 3 different properties for what seemed like no good reason. It was so frustrating, we began to think we would never possess our own home.

When you think you are doing everything right, you are being authentic and honourable, the job seems perfect for you, the bloke ticks all the right boxes, he is over 5 11’, solvent, divorced, likes kids and dogs and oh yeah he is a pretty good snogger! Then Bam! Just as you get ready to hand over your heart, you discover he has a fatal flaw. Commitment phobia! And a preference to relationships without strings.

Why, I am asked again and again, that even when it’s seems so right on paper it never works out? What I am meant to be learning?

This universe – busy rushing around teaching us all lessons – needs to get a life! I ponder on the way we have come to personalize the so called “universe”. What’s your agenda universe? Who gave you the right to decide what I needed to learn?

I think I may be a little bit of a Maverick here. I don’t believe that we are being taught anything really, I think it is highly likely that as we wander through the landscape of our life that opportunities arise that seem to work, seem the right thing to do, the right partner, job, whatever, but in fact for whatever reason they are not right for us and we push against them. We try to make them fit. A bit like me trying to fit into my pre kid’s jeans, it’s a happy little fantasy. That would take either starvation, a shoe horn or liberal slathering of coconut oil to the thighs, none of which would work for me as I like food too much, don’t own a shoe horn and have better uses for coconut oil than applying to my thighs.

My answer is always this; “What is the common denominator in all these so called lessons? What are you resisting?”

There is a really simple way to get past this universal exam. If it ain’t flowing, then stop. Literally just stop. Stop and wait, keep your eyes and ears open.

I love that American Indian saying, “If your canoe is drifting to the waterfall pray to God, but paddle hard.”

We are responsible for our own experiences, we create our own luck, if we believe that it is going to go belly up then yes, it will! Our reality, our experience flows directly from our mind, our mind set is far more powerful than any Universe bogey man.

You want a lesson? Then here it is. You make your own luck, you are the creator of your own reality, if you are experiencing resistance, then the lesson – if you need to call it that – is stop, just stop, wait, and apply yourself as best you can.  This is not your time, this is not your moment, pause, gather strength, develop wisdom and, patience because I can promise you this; your moment will come. And number fifty one might be Mr Perfect!

The right thing will arise for you when all of the pieces fall into place at the allotted moment. No one is waiting for you to learn that lesson, other than you.  The universal bogey man is just another creation that comes from within your mind. I dress mine in drag!  He never ceases to amuse me!

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