So I come in from work and the girls follow me to the dining room to compare notes on who is the fattest! Obviously I win this competition hands down. Just to be clear I am not fat, but am on the upper end of curvy, a stone or two down would be a good idea! But I am either too lazy to move fast enough to shift or I like my weekends too much. I own up, my relationship with Prosecco is far more important with my relationship with size 10 jeans.
But apparently I don’t count “Cause you had kids, and you’re like in a relationship and he doesn’t care what you look like.” Yeah right that’s nice. Nice to know I am now at the ripe old age of 45 I am past it, not worth even bothering about. And my boyfriend doesn’t care what I look like!
I look at the girls slim, toned, groomed and bloody gorgeous and want to bang my head off the wall. What are they measuring themselves against? How can a size 8-10 be fat? Of course I know what they are measuring themselves against, blooming models, actresses and reality tv stars. When did being yourself stop being good enough. I mean growing up I had my weight issues to be sure, I even suffered with anorexia for a while but I never wanted to look the same as anyone else, I wanted to be different, to stand out, to be me! Nowadays everyone wants to look the same, same hair, same jewellery, same honey tan, same HD brows, same beige shoes or is it grey now? What happened to being you, to looking in the mirror and seeing a unique and personal reflection. I love the look of the aging face, the wrinkles, the softness of the belly of a women who has brought forth life, the story of your life is written all over you. I love that, it so beautiful. I like it because I am older, I do get that, but it troubles me that they all judge themselves so harshly, have so much self-loathing, even when brought up in a home where health and self-expression is so important. I guess it’s true that your peers teach you as much if not more than your family.
I am dragged out of my musings by size 10! “Mum you don’t get it, look at her ear, it’s not NORMAL.”
“What are you talking about normal, how can her ear not be normal?” I retort, I mean I gave birth to this girl and I think I would know if there was genuine deformity of the ear.
“Look.” She says tucking her sister’s hair behind her hair, whilst said sister, the skinny one who everyone hates because she is skinny continues stuffing her face with chilli.
“Look her ear is on sideways.”
“Sideways? What on earth are you talking about? How can someone’s ear be on sideways?”
“Look.” She is getting exasperated now, and starts yanking at the ear pulling it up towards her sister’s scalp! “Ouch stop it.”
My mouth opens and closes, there is nothing to say really it’s an ear, on the side of her head, she can hear, she wears earrings, it looks neither too large or too small. In short it’s an ear!
“What do you mean by normal exactly?” Says I. “I mean what are you measuring it against?”
“Yeah whatever but it just doesn’t look normal?”
There is a pause whilst we all peruse the offending monstrous ear.
“Why am I so fat?” Says size 10 whilst grabbing at the skin around her stomach.
“You’re not fat you’re gorgeous.”
“I am fat, I am xxx stone. No one else in the family is so fat. How can I lose weight?”
“Well if you really want to know, cut back on carbs……”
“I do it never works.”
Then daughter who by the way is a size 10 a bloody size 10! “Well it doesn’t work you say that all the time and you are still…..” There is a sharp intake of breath. Mine.
Other daughter pipes up, the skinny one. “You need to come out on a run with me.”
“I did it didn’t make a difference and I am so slow I can’t keep up with you.”
“You came once and it doesn’t matter how slow you are you just have to move.”
“Exactly.” I pipe up. I am given a look by the both of them, a look that says, “You are FAT proper FAT you have no idea so shut up.”
Then skinny daughter who does generally do the right stuff and thus has slim legs, flat stomach and a very tight butt, bitch! “No matter how slow you go you are still lapping everyone on the couch.”
“Exactly.” I yell, and we high five! Skinny daughter hasn’t been talking to me for about three days and remembers that and looks away embarrassed.
“Are you blushing?” Says size 10 “fat” daughter.
“No!” Says skinny.
“You so are. Lols.”
“Look.” Size 10 again, she pulls her cheeks up tight and peers at herself in the mirror. “This is how good I will look when I am skinny.”
Skinny and I exchange glances, “You look daft, that’s horrible, never do anything to your beautiful face” I say, terrified of the idea of her taking out a bank loan and getting a face lift, nose job and boob job. Not that I am projecting much!
“You look ancient.” says skinny laughing.
“You do.” I agree.
“Oh well I like my face and my feet, they are the two things I actually do like about myself.”
The conversation moves onto what exercise class they are going to join, at the time of writing it was kick boxing. I like this idea, I think of them kicking the ass of all the men who sniff around them. Yes kick boxing, do that. But by the time I got to this point in the blog she has popped her head around the door to tell me she has changed her mind and wants to do pole dancing.
Let’s not go there!
Girls, boys, women, men love yourself, you are unique, you are a masterclass in perfection, you are unlike any other person on the planet. You are bespoke. If you don’t like how you feel in your skin then fix it, but whilst you are busy, moving your body or improving your diet love yourself, you are simply blooming marvellous.
oogle oo
So I come in from work and the girls follow me to the dining room to compare notes on who is the fattest! Obviously I win this competition hands down. Just to be clear I am not fat, but am on the upper end of curvy, a stone or two down would be a good idea! But I am either too lazy to move fast enough to shift or I like my weekends to much. I own up, my relationship with Prosecco is far more important with my relationship with size 10 jeans.
But apparently I don’t count “Cause you had kids, and your like in a relationship and he doesn’t care what you look like.” Yeah right that’s nice. Nice to know I am now at the ripe old age of 45 I am past it, not worth even bothering about. And my boyfriend doesn’t care what I look like!
I look at the girls slim, toned, groomed and bloody gorgeous and want to bang my head of the wall. What are they measuring themselves against? How can a size 8-10 be fat? Of course I know what they are measuring themselves against, blooming models, actresses and reality tv stars. When did being yourself stop being good enough. I mean growing up I had my weight issues to be sure, I even suffered with anorexia for a while but I never wanted to look the same as anyone else, I wanted to be different, to stand out, to be me! Nowadays everyone wants to look the same, same hair, same jewellery, same honey tan, same HD brows, same beige shoes or is it grey now? What happened to being you, to looking in the mirror and seeing a unique and personal reflection. I love the look of the aging face, the wrinkles, the softness of the belly of a women who has brought forth life, the story of your life is written all over you. I love that, it so beautiful. I like it because I am older, I do get that, but it troubles me that they all judge themselves so harshly, have so much self-loathing, even when brought up in a home where health and self-expression is so important. I guess it’s true that your peers teach you as much if not more than your family.
I am dragged out of my musings by size 10! “Mum you don’t get it, look at her ear, it’s not NORMAL.”
“What are you talking about normal how her ear can be not normal?” I retort, I mean I gave birth to this girl and I think I would know if there was genuine deformity of the ear.
“Look.” She says tucking her sister’s hair behind her hair, whilst said sister, the skinny one who everyone hates because she is skinny continues stuffing her face with chilli.
“Look her ear is on sideways.”
“Sideways? What on earth are you talking about? How can someone’s ear be on sideways?”
“Look.” She is getting exasperated now, and starts yanking at the ear pulling it up towards her sister’s scalp! “Ouch stop it.”
My mouth opens and closes, there is nothing to say really it’s an ear, on the side of her head, she can hear, she wears earrings, it looks neither too large or too small. In short it’s and ear!
“What do you mean by normal exactly?” Says I. “I mean what are you measuring it against?”
“Yeah whatever but it just doesn’t look normal?”
There is a pause whilst we all peruse the offending monstrous ear.
“Why am I so fat?” Says size 10 whilst grabbing at the skin around her stomach.
“You’re not fat your gorgeous.”
“I am fat, I am xxx stone. No one else in the family is so fat. How can I lose weight?”
“Well if you really want to know, cut back on carbs……”
“I do it never works.”
Then daughter who by the way is a size 10 a bloody size 10! “Well it doesn’t work you say that all the time and you are still…..” There is a sharp intake of breath. Mine.
Other daughter pipes up, the skinny one. “You need to come out on a run with me.”
“I did it didn’t make a difference and I am so slow I can’t keep up with you.”
“You came once and it doesn’t matter how slow you are you just have to move.”
“Exactly.” I pipe up. I am given a look by the both of them, a look that says, “You are FAT proper FAT you have no idea so shut up.”
Then skinny daughter who does generally do the right stuff and thus has slim legs, flat stomach and a very tight butt, bitch! “No matter how slow you go you are still lapping everyone on the couch.”
“Exactly.” I yell, and we high five! Skinny daughter hasn’t been talking to me for about three days and remembers that and looks away embarrassed.
“Are you blushing?” Says size 10 “fat” daughter.
“No!” Says skinny.
“You so are. Lols.”
“Look.” Size 10 again, she pulls her cheeks up tight and peers at herself in the mirror. “This is how good I will look when I am skinny.”
Skinny and I exchange glances, “You look daft, that’s horrible, never do anything to your beautiful face.” I say terrified of the idea of her taking out a bank loan and getting a face lift, nose job and boob job. Not that I am projecting much!
“You look ancient.” Says skinny laughing.
“You do.” I agree.
“Oh well I like my face and my feet, they are the two things I actually do like about myself.”
The conversation moves onto what exercise class they are going to join, at the time of writing it was kick boxing. I like this idea, I think of them kicking the ass of all the men who sniff around them. Yes kick boxing, do that. But by the time I got to this point in the blog she has popped her head around the door to tell me she has changed her mind and wants to do pole dancing.
Let’s not go there!
Girls, boys, women, men love yourself, you are unique, you are a masterclass in perfection, you are unlike any other person on the planet. You are bespoke. If you don’t like how you feel in your skin then fix it, but whilst you are busy, moving your body or improving your diet love yourself, you are simply blooming marvellous.
